I used to have a 7ish-year streak of not throwing up. It lasted from November 20, 2000 until March 12, 2008. (Yes, I know exact dates. November 20 was two days after my brother got married, and March 12 was the 7-year anniversary of one of my friend's death.) In honor of my recent throwing up event, let's talk about this one special day of vomiting.
So. Let's go back to November 20, 2000. Why do I remember this date so well? It's the day I got my learner's permit to drive. Oh may was that the best day ever. I had just turned 15, and I WAS SO READY TO DRIVE.
Now many of you have been to hell, which may also be called the DMV. It is quite possibly the worst place in the whole wide world. It may even be worse than the post office, ugh. The mother decided we should get there before the DMV opened so I could get in line early, and we could get out of there quickly.
We got there ahead of time. The mother stayed in the car while I nervously stood in line with the other patrons. All of a sudden, I knew I was going to throw up. Back in the day, my legs would shake uncontrollably before I threw up. That doesn't happen anymore. I didn't throw up because of nerves. I don't do that. I just had to throw up. Of course, I was in public. I frantically searched around for a place to throw up.
I found a trash can. I had to get out of line in order to throw up. I was bent over the trash can throwing up. Fun. The mother noticed I was out of line and started yelling at me from the car. "BOOB NAZI! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! GET BACK IN LINE!!!!" I was throwing up so I couldn't exactly yell back, "I'M THROWING UP. LEAVE ME ALONE!!"
Some kind soul walked by me and set a bottle of water on the trash can. I wiped my mouth and thanked her. Then I went out to the mother and told her what happened. I'm sure she was appropriately sympathetic. She just is. After that, I got back in line, went into the DMV when it opened, and passed my test. I'm just that awesome.
The image of me throwing up into the trash can while my mom yelled at me from the car still makes me laugh pretty hard. That was a rough day.